A swirling vortex

I've been sick for the past few days. This makes me mad.

It makes me mad partly, of course, because it means I don't feel good, but it makes me madder because it means I can't work and I can't run. I mean, I'm not going to pretend I hate sitting in a reclining chair drinking tea and watching Gilmore Girls and What I Like About You. But when I started substitute teaching, and many times since, I calculated what I could expect to earn in an average week in, and how I could use that money. Turns out with all the various eschatologically-themed snowstorms recently, I've worked only 2.5 days in February. And then running--around Christmas I was asking advice on how to cut 10 minutes off my half marathon time. Now I'm so behind schedule on training I'm not even sure I'll be able to finish.

It forces us to slow down. I've heard people say that about being sick. I also heard people say that about the snow. And maybe it's true. In general, people in America need to slow down, even if it infuriates us to have to do so. However, I do not consider myself to be one of those people just now. I'm already living life at a crawl these days it seems. So what about when being sick just keeps you slowed down? When it makes life, in the words of Sheldon Cooper, "a swirling vortex of entropy?"

But even so, I suppose I can stand to be reminded that I'm not completely in control once in a while. I'm not completely in control of my income. I'm not in control of my training schedule. I can respond in ways that make the best of both--not spending as much, walking if I don't have a run in me, all that good stuff. And in the meantime, I suppose remembering my own lack of control over my plans is an occasion to trust God for things to be OK despite everything.